Random art-dump of odd-ball doodles I don’t believe I ever posted?
I have little memory of when these were done, probably early this year, and late last year? Mainly all random tests with skin tones and side-profiling
Also Epo! That image was going to be my Icon photo before the current, top-hat wearing eeper was drawn. But Epo’s drawing got back-burnered because I felt their design was getting too busy and eye-tiring. So the background and such never got finished, and then it all got abandoned,,
I’m tired, which seems to be a fairly perpetual thing recently, so I’m not gonna say much more, enjoy the doodles!
Got a prescription for medication that’s side effects heighten depression and suicidal feelings, as well as the possibility to go completely blind within a month
Now I know, these are just possible side-effects. And just because it could happen doesn’t mean it will. But this is for an issue I don’t even have/when I do have, is barely problematic
High risk low reward right here fellas. Criminy has this medical journey been something else
Hope you've been doing well! I miss you :>
Sincerely, doll-kun
Ah hello! I’ve been doing okay, some ups and downs, but such is expected ’^^
It’s nice to hear from you again! I miss you as well, and I hope you’re doing well and that life is being kind <3
I am so very thankful to have blankets
I am often so cold recently and each time I cover up at night I think about how lucky I am to even have one
I love my blanket and I will never take blankets for granted
Here’s to everyone who was doing better, but has hit a rough period. It’s okay. You will be okay, you just gotta hang in there. Steps backs happen, and you are not going backwards. You still have your strenght and all that you have learned that can help you get back on your feet, and better days will reach you, right now you just gotta hang on and wait for the storm to pass enough for you to feel like you can get up and move forwards. 🌸
For people with OCD, Cluster B disorders and other ND conditions that cause intense guilt:
You are human. Hurting others is an inevitable part of the human condition. It's how you react to the harm you've done that defines you. You can grow, you're worth loving, you're worth knowing, you're worth supporting. Please don't condemn yourself for being imperfect in an age that demands perfection.
I’ve come to the realization that I’m doing the thing again
The thing I’ve done many times in the past; I swore this time it’d be different, but I caught up to me again it seems
And, well, I wanted to write about it
At times I will want to straight-up just fall off the face of the earth. For no reason other than ‘we sad today’. But it’s not just for a day, and I feel this has been going on for about 8 months?
I’ve been subconsciously distancing myself from people.
My friends, people I’d like as friends, any form of interactions.
It’s why my posts have been slowing. Why progress is dead, but will have bursts where like 16 things are complete and I binge post
I’ve done this before, distancing myself so the blow of me being out of one’s life is lessened. But I don’t wanna be out of anyone’s lives.
My drive in like concrete right now, I can’t get it to move. I find myself fighting to do anything, and I’m losing concept of time so bad. Just like the other times before. I’m telling people they shouldn’t talk to me or even want to. But the problem is, I do! I wanna talk with them, but it’s so hard!
Whatever is wrong in my brain is doing it again! I get sad when I can’t work on projects! When I can’t talk with friends! Creating and being there for others is the only thing that makes me feel alive! Makes me want to be alive! And that’s its ploy, It’s distancing me, and when no one reaches out, it tells me I won’t be missed! I can’t work on things so it tells me I’m worthless and should stop trying!
I can’t let this happen again, I don’t know how to fight, but I won’t go down without one
In more ‘news-no-one-asked’ It seems there’s a large amount of consensus with all my docs that my experiences/complaints are near-syncope episodes
Getting more tests, talking with more docs. And we’re looking into dysautonomia, I relate hard with its symptoms and talking on forums with folks, I relate hard to their experiences
This is reliving and stressing. 'cause yay, if it comes back positive, turns out I’m actually sick and not just a big baby!
Humans don’t feel this way all the time! Wow!
But also, depending on the findings, this means I may never drive or get to live alone.
I am going to be stuck here forever :)
I can feel bad thoughts brewing already! :D
Knowing your friends love languages are important too. Don’t neglect making those around you feel valued in the way they best understand it.
You are not what happened to you. You didn't deserve to go through all that. You deserved to be loved, to feel safe, to be safe. You deserved kindness. Patience. You deserved better.
Hey, my love. I just wanted to check in and let you know that it is completely okay to feel lonely; to feel disconnected from the people around you; to feel like nobody really cares about you. Sometimes life gets busy and people stop talking to you. They suddenly do not have or make time for you anymore. But I promise you that there will be other times as well; times when new people enter your life or old friends find their way back to you. Trust me when I say: The loneliness you are feeling is only temporary. There is a season for everything - and you, my darling, are so loved and so worthy in every one of them.